The Bitterness Blog


License Plate of the Day
August 20, 2009, 8:08 pm
Filed under: License Plate of the Day

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So the way I figure it, there are two likely possibilities as to the meaning behind this license plate.  The first is that it has something to do with tigers, as in, eye of the tiger, vicious beast, tiger in bed, whatever tiger-related stereotype is most to your liking.  But for some reason, when I first saw this plate, my mind jumped to option number two:  Tigger, the classic character from Winnie the Poo. 

That level of exuberance is not normal.

That level of exuberance is not normal.

I don’t have a problem with Tigger per say, although to be honest I always thought he seemed like kind of a jackass.  Like if he were a person, he would be that guy that gets drunk at every gathering and sort of slobbers all over everyone and makes frequent declarations of love and wants a hug all night long.  I haven’t seen the cartoon Winnie the Pooh in years, but if recollection serves me, there was a strong possibility that Tigger was actually retarded.  Suffice it to say, I personally wouldn’t want to associate myself with that character via license plate, but it’s not even the particular character that really bugs me.

When I was a kid, I knew a girl whose family was obsessed with Disney.  They made as many trips as possible to Disney World, they had Disney paraphernalia plastered all over all of their vehicles, they wore Disney attire on a regular basis.  As a kid I thought it was kind of cool, although they drove to Florida in a camper when they went and even by age 5 I had figured out that camper was not my chosen method of travel.  I don’t know this family anymore, so I can’t really say if the parents did this for the kids or if they really were hot for Disney too, but appearances implied that they were all about some Disney despite being in their 40s.

Is this Epcot?  Remember that awesome 3D Michael Jackson movie they had?  That rocked.

Is this Epcot? Remember that awesome 3D Michael Jackson movie they had? That rocked.

The magic of Disney is not lost on me, and I don’t even think it’s that weird to regress into childhood and prance around a fairytale playland for a vacay once a year, under one condition:  leave Disney shit at Disney once you are over the age of 12.   A woman in a class I took last spring carried with her to every class meeting a Disney’s Tinkerball bag.  Like, embroidered Tinkerball doing fairy shit all over the bag.  To class.  A graduate level class.  This chick was married and at least 25.  I find that to be weird and unacceptable, which is the way that I felt about the license plate I saw the other day that said LVDSNY on it, complete with Disney bumper stickers.  I am familiar with the pain and tragic futility of adulthood, but deal with that the normal ways, like over-eating, sex, and drugs. 

That being said, I am totally going to see this movie:

It's starring a frog!  Why didn't someone do this before?

It's starring a frog! Why didn't someone do this before?

First of all, I LOVE frogs.  Frogs are nature’s finest creation (after Bradley Cooper and Alexander Skarsgard).  I also remember and loved the old school days of flat animation Disney movies.  When I was a kid, the release of a new Disney animated picture was an EVENT.  I don’t know if that’s changed because it really changed or because I’m no longer even close to a kid and therefore not invited to the party, but I miss it nonetheless.  And have you seen the previews?  It’s the first one where the main characters are black, it takes place in New Orleans, and the bad guy is an evil voodoo doctor.  It’s like Disney just chose from a list of black stereotypes and ran with it.  If we’re really lucky there might even end up being slaves in it!

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