The Bitterness Blog

License Plate of the Day
November 25, 2009, 8:34 pm
Filed under: License Plate of the Day

It is the time of the year when we stop and give thanks, so if you are reading my blog,  I truly appreciate you taking the time to stop by. 


If I Die Today in This Office, Someone, Please Sue
November 25, 2009, 8:31 pm
Filed under: Work Bitching

It’s 3:25pm and seeing as it’s the day before a holiday, NO ONE is at work…but  me.  I can hear crickets chirp.  Tumbleweed is rolling by.  I haven’t had contact with another human being in roughly an hour.  But my boss rolled out without saying a word at 11am today, and everyone else in my department is gone, so there isn’t even anyone I can ask about leaving early.  I’m tempted to just go.  Feeling very conflicted.  Fuck. Me.  Were I to be struck by a heart attack right now, I would die alone in this office unless I could reach for the phone in time to dial 911 before floating down to the underworld, because there is no one here to help me.  And that’s not really a safe working environment, is it?

License Plate of the Day
November 24, 2009, 4:56 pm
Filed under: License Plate of the Day

This is a Maryland plate, and apparently those Marylanders are colorful folk because that is one bright license plate.  Anyways, Thanksgiving is a time when we consider our ancestors, right?  Sort of?  Work with me.


Just Because I’m Bitter Doesn’t Mean You Have to Be
November 24, 2009, 4:10 pm
Filed under: Musings of a Random Nature

So, yeah, I hate life.  But that doesn’t mean there aren’t occasional flashes of joy .  I live in a world where Sarah Palin was thisclose to being VP of the United States (bitterness), but I also live in a world that contains Alexander Skarsgard, Jon Hamm, Bradley Cooper and Keith Olbermann (joy).  Granted all of those people are totally on the periphery of my life and don’t even know I exist, but whatevs.  The point is, some things do penetrate this cold black heart, and this website I stumbled upon is one of them:

It’s like the anithesis of The Bitterness Blog, but they had me at #629, because how true is that?  And number 628?  Every. Night. 

So check it out and enjoy, and when you get overwhelmed by the awesome in life and need a kick in the ass to remind you that it really mostly sucks to be alive, come right on back over and pay me a visit.  I’ll be here, and I’ll still be bitter.

License Plate of the Day
November 23, 2009, 9:49 pm
Filed under: License Plate of the Day

And speaking of 66 sucking balls:

Sort of an arty photo, don't you think? Or sort of taken while driving at night. Whichever.


Karma is my Bitch
November 23, 2009, 9:00 pm
Filed under: Musings of a Random Nature

Something very cool happened over the weekend that gave me great joy.  I was driving on 66, it was 6pm, and traffic was bumper-to-bumper.  On a weekend, on route 66, at 6pm.  Are the three 6’s involved in that equation a coincidence?  I think not.  Anyways, I was pretty peeved as you can imagine because seriously, why is it so goddamn difficult to drive to Lauren’s (fabulous) new apartment on a Saturday evening?  The right-most lane at this point on 66 is one of those lanes that is only open at certain times, and there are electronic signs that use either a red X or a green arrow to indicate this.  The red X was a-glowing, but since traffic sucked, some douchebag decided he would just use that lane to pass all of us poor law-abiding suckers and cut us off when he was done with that and wanted to re-enter the actual (sucky) flow of (legal) traffic.  Because, you know, he’s special.  He was doing that, and I looked over and was annoyed.  I was even more annoyed because he was already way past me, so he wasn’t going to be trying to cut me off when he was done abusing the closed lane, so I wasn’t going to be able to have the pleasure of blocking him and laying the horn on.  Double fail.

This would be one of those moments when I would actually like to see a cop, when a cop’s presence would be useful.  And we all know cops are never around when you actually want to see them.  I was lamenting that very fact when…drumroll…a cop pulled out of traffic, turned on his siren, and chased that obnoxious fucker down!  How. Great. Is. That.  I *might* have clapped and cheered. 

And this is my new favorite picture EVER

License Plate of the Day
November 20, 2009, 8:57 pm
Filed under: License Plate of the Day

It’s the weekend (finally!).  You know what to do: